Wisdom Bridges – Book Review by Namrata Kohli
They say - “If you do not know where you come from, then you don't know where you're going. And if you don't know where you're going, you're probably going wrong.” Who are the people who can tell us where we come from... the only people who can educate us on our roots are our elders. And they are the wisdom bridges- people who have lived their lives ... and they can pass on the wisdom from the past to the present to build a great future.
It takes a village to
raise a child... Raising
a child is a team effort – now that surveillance network of grandmothers is
going and you have Nannies over Nanis, there is a big erosion of cultural
values that we can evidently see. Kids tend to marvel over Avengers and Animae
and not Dada Dadi ki kahaniyan ... bad habits like smoking, drinking, abusive language make you
cool.
Daaji talks of some key phrases such as “Nature Vs Nurture”, the concept of Epigenetics where genes you have inherited plus upbringing
that you have shapes you... he says and I quote –“Wisdom is not taught. It is
caught.” This can percolate effortlessly if there is proximity physically and a connect emotionally. However, with the breakdown of joint family system, there is often a breakdown of communication between grandparents and grandchildren. This leads to children being deprived of wisdom which their grandparents have gathered over years.
Daaji shares some beautiful examples of races that relied on
generational wisdom such as the Wayfinder – how they conquered the seas
centuries before the Europeans did. Or the Shamans of the Amazon Forest, the tribals
who understand medicinal use of plants better than most doctors would… But our pharmaceutical industry is often dismissive
of nature as a source of healing. He says and I quote – “How cultures
that worshipped the seas and revered the trees lost out to cultures that
exploited the seas and axed the trees.” He says that "when a Wayfinder or shaman dies, a
library burns down to the ground – all
knowledge, all wisdom vanishes in an instant."
Today, there is too
much focus on how to make money rather than how to make character… days and
months are spent in planning the milestone birthdays of a child right from baby
shower and a birthday is planned every month of the year… these indulgences
that make a child feel special rather than secure, a child feel exclusive rather
than the grandparents feel inclusive and that is really at the heart of the problem.
The author says parenting
needs to be heartful, joyful where there is abundance of love flowing like a
river… but today everyone wants a mouthful of sky .. where everyone wants only
the best branded toys, strolleys, cribs, prams and then the biggest name in
town for a school. But there is no school as effective as your grandparents who
teach you everything from wisdom, emotion, feeling, intuition, inspiration
Finally, greying doesn’t mean losing out .. it means filling up with experience.. wrinkles and scars show how one has been through reckless days and sleepless nights and there are many stories behind them
Today these Wisdom bridges have slipped away into shadows. People
beyond a certain age are left to fend for themselves... those who move to
communities and homes they get the healthcare amenities, but will they get the
atmosphere of inclusion we don’t know.
On the other hand, even
the youngsters tend to lose out…today we have homes after homes of super
achievers – kids who know which planet and which asteroid and know the composition of the universe, but they don't know the composition of their homes, or their family tree. Also, they can’t make a
meal on their own, can’t wash a cloth, do laundry, iron clothes- and there is total lack of life skills.
We must question who our kids’ role models are. Why they are swayed away and mesmerized by some social media influencer and not influenced by the elders of their family or extended family. Daaji's book raises some very important questions... its high time we gave the "Wisdom Bridges" their deserved due, more for our sake than theirs and gave them a place in our heart, head and home.
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