Skip to main content

Separation or Resolution: What Works For Women

 

By Namrata Kohli 
Columnist Woman Wise

Recently we heard the news of AR Rahman and Saira separating after 29 years. Rahman shared on social media, stating, "We had hoped to reach the grand thirty, but all things, it seems, carry an unseen end."

A couple of days ago, I was reading about Sarika (who had a love marriage with actor Kamal Hassan) and after sixteen years of marriage, she was left homeless after her separation from the actor. She had nothing but a car to her name and spent nights in it. That image kept running in my mind like a breaking news scroll.  

It made me wonder— across different kinds of marriages, why is divorce/separation becoming so rampant? Why do couples separate after decades of marriage, and when children are there in the picture? No this isn’t about Kamal’s divorce or ARR’s personal matters—it’s about divorce and separation itself. When couples separate early in life, there’s a certain meaning or hope for starting over. But when you’re in your 40s or 50s, why do people make such decisions? When we’ve lost our youth and grown older, what’s the point of making such drastic decisions especially when the cost of divorce is disproportionately high for one person- usually the women. So shouldn’t there be a fair and more humane solution? 

After all, living separately doesn’t always require legal separation. Sadhguru says divorce should be avoided as much as can be and even calls it “voluntary death – you have decided to kill something that is a part of you.” Divorce and widowhood are the same in the sense that both types of dissolutions have negative and prolonged consequences.

Bad, boring, even bitter patches are normal in every long-term relationship. Disagreements happen in every relationship. Don’t they happen between father and son, mother and daughter, brother and sister… simply because you have an Exit option in the husband wife relationship, you opt for the 'Delete' button.

Separation is never the only solution and the decision for resolution or separation should be well analysed and done with more objectvity– we have to think before acting.

They say it takes two to tango but women need to realize the power of one – It takes a spark to ignite the fire. The ripple effect starts with a single drop. One voice can move the mountains and one small step for man was one giant leap for mankind.

Take charge of your life—know what works best for you and hold the remote to your own destiny. Bend, mend, bow, make, break- you can be the change that you want to see.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Telemedicine to the aid of home-bound patients in the time of Covid-19

Telemedicine in covid-19 times: You can get to the doctor almost anytime, anywhere, be it on your screen, via voice or plain text for a lower price than in-person consult Namrata Kohli   |   New Delhi Telehealth is bridging the gap between patient and physicians. The physician can now virtually visit the stay-at-home patient and heal from a distance Telemedicine in covid-19 times:  When 37-year-old Priyanka was down with fever and dry cough, she decided to consult a doctor over a WhatsApp call before giving her blood sample for an RT-PCR test. Based on her symptoms, the physician alerted her that it wasn't a mild Covid infection but a moderate one. His diagnosis was confirmed when the test report showed a viral load count of 20. “The massive benefits of telemedicine became evident during the pandemic,” says Priyanka’s doctor, New Delhi-based consultant physician Dr Arvind Kumar. “Everything is about time and if my patients have complications late at ni...

Why The Heck Not? DLF’s KP Singh Book Sharing His Blueprint For Success

  By Namrata Kohli “Before KP took over an almost dormant DLF at the behest of his wife Indira and sister-in-law Prem, he knew nothing about real estate – zero!” This may sound unbelievable but that’s the absolute truth about a man who is credited with turnaround of Gurugram and setting the gold standard for luxury real estate in India. K.P. Singh’s book “Why the heck not?” is an interesting account of his life’s journey where co-author Aparna Jain variously describes him as “a forever learner”, a “one man army”. His blueprint for success? Shares KP  Singh- "I believe every opportunity is like a train standing on a platform. The train’s door opens for a short while, either you get in or when the door closes the train leaves. Opportunity comes to every human being, it is your smartness how to quickly find out yes or no and then grab it before somebody else grabs it.  Every person should know when opportunity comes. T herefore I say, why the heck not?" Co-author Aparna ...

Riders on the storm: Indian biking comes into its own

  With the advent of a slew of foreign makes, Indian bikers are now spoilt for choice, and the growing numbers of riders point to the emergence of a proper riding culture in the country      Namrata Kohli   New Delhi       “Biking teaches us to be a better human. Riding a motorcycle connects you directly to the road, the wind, and the environment in a way that feels thrilling and immersive. We all live in such a selfish world but when biking, you let people into your world .  As soon as I sit on a motorbike and put on the helmet it is my time with myself, and I drop all my worries on the highway and move on, ” says c elebrity motorbiker Dr. Maral  Yazarloo -Pattrick   Indeed, motorcycle-riding has come a long way in India. Until recently something that you saw in American movies, riding now has a clutch of clubs and a dedicated fan base among Indian riders, cutting a cross regions and classes.    Naturally, a hard-core bik...