Separation or Resolution: What Works For Women

By Namrata Kohli
Columnist Woman Wise

Recently we heard the news of AR Rahman and Saira separating after 29 years. Rahman shared on social media, stating, "We had hoped to reach the grand thirty, but all things, it seems, carry an unseen end."

A couple of days ago, I was reading about Sarika (who had a love marriage with actor Kamal Hassan) and after sixteen years of marriage, she was left homeless after her separation from the actor. She had nothing but a car to her name and spent nights in it. That image kept running in my mind like a breaking news scroll.

It made me wonder— across different kinds of marriages, why is divorce/separation becoming so rampant? Why do couples separate after decades of marriage, and when children are there in the picture? No this isn’t about Kamal’s divorce or ARR’s personal matters—it’s about divorce and separation itself. When couples separate early in life, there’s a certain meaning or hope for starting over. But when you’re in your 40s or 50s, why do people make such decisions? When we’ve lost our youth and grown older, what’s the point of making such drastic decisions especially when the cost of divorce is disproportionately high for one person- usually the women. So shouldn’t there be a fair and more humane solution?

After all, living separately doesn’t always require legal separation. Sadhguru says divorce should be avoided as much as can be and even calls it “voluntary death – you have decided to kill something that is a part of you.” Divorce and widowhood are the same in the sense that both types of dissolutions have negative and prolonged consequences.

Bad, boring, even bitter patches are normal in every long-term relationship. Disagreements happen in every relationship. Don’t they happen between father and son, mother and daughter, brother and sister… simply because you have an Exit option in the husband wife relationship, you opt for the 'Delete' button.

Separation is never the only solution and the decision for resolution or separation should be well analysed and done with more objectvity– we have to think before acting.

They say it takes two to tango but women need to realize the power of one – It takes a spark to ignite the fire. The ripple effect starts with a single drop. One voice can move the mountains and one small step for man was one giant leap for mankind.

Take charge of your life—know what works best for you and hold the remote to your own destiny. Bend, mend, bow, make, break- you can be the change that you want to see.

Comments

Telemedicine to the aid of home-bound patients in the time of Covid-19

Telemedicine in covid-19 times: You can get to the doctor almost anytime, anywhere, be it on your screen, via voice or plain text for a lower price than in-person consult Namrata Kohli | New Delhi Telehealth is bridging the gap between patient and physicians. The physician can now virtually visit the stay-at-home patient and heal from a distance Telemedicine in covid-19 times: When 37-year-old Priyanka was down with fever and dry cough, she decided to consult a doctor over a WhatsApp call before giving her blood sample for an RT-PCR test. Based on her symptoms, the physician alerted her that it wasn't a mild Covid infection but a moderate one. His diagnosis was confirmed when the test report showed a viral load count of 20. “The massive benefits of telemedicine became evident during the pandemic,” says Priyanka’s doctor, New Delhi-based consultant physician Dr Arvind Kumar. “Everything is about time and if my patients have complications late at ni...

A good racket: How India is courting Pickleball, 'game of the people'

Pickleball India: From Backyard Game to Breakout Sport “Pickleball is my 3F formula—Fitness, Friends, and Fun!” – Says Rihanna Anand, a 35 year old Delhi based homemaker – “I’m no athlete, but even I can smash it on court. Every morning at 8 sharp, you'll find me and my Vasant Vihar gang swinging paddles and laughing our way through doubles. Who needs a gym when you’ve got this?” It all began with a paddle and a plastic ball. Today, pickleball—the quirky lovechild of tennis, badminton, and table tennis—is the fastest-growing sport in India. From luxury townships and corporate campuses to schools and weekend turf courts, the game is sweeping the country with a racket. What is Pickleball—and Why is Everyone Obsessed? Invented in 1965 on Bainbridge Island, Washington, pickleball was designed as a backyard game for families. Played on a court similar to badminton with a 34-inch net, it involves smacking a perforated plastic ball with a paddle. The rules are easy to learn, the rallies...

Rise of the robot cleaners: Are these devices worth the hype and the cost?

Picture this: A disc-shaped device gliding across your living room, mapping, sweeping, mopping—cleaning your floors while you sip your chai or take Zoom calls. Once a futuristic luxury, robotic vacuum cleaners have now entered the Indian mainstream. The question is—are they worth the investment? Rise of the robot cleaners: Are robotic vacuums worth the hype—and the spend? By Namrata Kohli Delhi based (retired) Indian Navy Officer Niladri Bose and his wife Priyanka, recently went for an overhaul in their lifestyle, from a servant cleaned home to a cleaning robot. Says Niladri Bose- “Over the years, we found ourselves increasingly dissatisfied with the way our home was being cleaned. While our domestic help was sincere, the quality of cleaning was inconsistent and often left much to be desired. The situation became particularly frustrating on days when she was unavailable. With our busy schedules and the desire for a consistently clean-living space, we began thinking: is there a be...

The Writer’s Flight

Search This Blog